Healing in Hawaii

Thank you everyone so incredibly much for your comments, sympathy, and understanding in light of the passing of our dear Toby. All of your comments warmed my heart and made me cry.

We are still operating in somewhat of a denial mode, so I haven’t even looked at my own blog in a little bit because I don’t want to relive things yet.

We are currently in Hawaii for a few days. This is our first real vacation in five years and was planned months ago. We never imagined Toby would suddenly pass the day before we were supposed to leave.

But as our sweet friend (and Toby & Mandy’s friend) Lisa said, Hawaii is a place of rest and healing, so we are happy to be here.

After the sudden loss of Toby and the rigorous crab season G just completed, this family time in a non-dreary and rainy environment is truly a blessing.

And thank you to my parents and Lisa for taking such good care of our other pup, Mandy, who is also deeply sad but hanging in.

I just keep thinking of everyone who has lost a pet, and those who have experienced even worse (as have we). None of it is easy but friends and family make it better.

Thank you all so much for everything.


    • As have you, my friend! I have been thinking of Hayden and wondering how he is and what the recovery has been.

      Vincent has a tough time; he wonders if Toby has a new eye in Heaven. Then he wonders if God called Toby up to fix his eye and will send him back home. Then he wonders where Mandy is. By the time his questions end, I’m in tears and whisk him over to look at the pool.

      Like my dad said…when you stop moving, the pain is awful. So for at least the next ten days I hope we can keep moving. :)

  1. I think it’s good for the kids to see you cry. It teaches them that it is okay to feel sad, hurt, afraid. And then they see you laugh, and it teaches them that joy and happiness are a vital part of a healing process, and that things do get better.

    I remember one night Addison was horribly sick. He kept crying and was so sad. I promised him that he would feel better in the morning, that he wouldn’t feel awful forever. He looked at me with tears, and said, “Are you sure it won’t last forever?” They need the reassurance that things will get better, even if it is only little by little, and slowly over time. That the day will come that you can all think about and talk about Toby and feel happy about the time you had with him, without feeling as terribly sad as you do right now.

    Hang in there! And do as Dorie from Nemo does, “Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming.” You couldn’t be in a better place for it, afterall!

    • This is why I love you so much. You are so right. I agree it’s good for the kids to see that we are sad, yet we can also be glad.

      “Toby didn’t feel good,” I say. “He feels much better now. We don’t want Toby to feel sick and sad, do we? And yes, God has a mansion. Big enough to fill with good dogs like Toby. Toby is with his doggie cousins. He has his eye back, is getting his vitamins, and he is happy.”

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